Most of us have a serious trouble getting over our past failures. This is because instead of focusing on what we can learn from it, we either run away from talking about our past or hold onto it for the wrong reasons. This is exactly what leads most people to have regrets in life. This attitude needs to change. All of us need to learn from our past instead of running away from it; and soon you will realize it is so easy to be objective about something that you thought bothered you!

1. Let Go –

The most basic form of learning you shall get from your past is to let it be in the past! One of the most common reasons for being depressed or sad in the present is the presence of sad experiences in the past. And the fear that such things will continue to repeat in our lives. Thus, if you are the kind of person who is constantly living in your past mistakes, hoping that you shall be able to change it, then your train of thought is on the wrong track. The past is gone; time waits for none! You can dream a thousand dreams hoping for things to be different, but only your future is in your hands. Take a diary or a journal and write down the feelings of the past and what you are still holding onto. This way it will be easier to see your past objectively in order to let it go. Also, if you can, talk about it with a confidant; it shall make you feel lighter.

2. Identify your weaknesses –

Past failures will very clearly define your weaknesses. Which is why when you look at it later you shall understand the causes or the kinds of weaknesses you have, i.e., what are the kind of situations you are unable to handle or find yourself stuck in too often. When you get a clear understanding of the same, you shall be able to find a solution. What can you do now so that you don’t consciously/unconsciously put yourself in the same spot?

3. Appreciate your strengths –

Undoubtedly when you sit to analyze your past it won’t be all thorns and no flowers! Once you identify your weaknesses, inevitably you shall able to understand what your strengths are too! But the more important aspect to learn from here is that your strengths should be able to help you understand what your motivations are, i.e., what are the things that you enjoy doing and can continue to do? What are the causes that energize you? What are some of the pursuits that you can run after relentlessly? Search them and go for it!

4. Change some habits –

Past habits create the most worry in us. Thus, the first step is to be able to identify little habits of your own self that not only make you a passive person but also disturb others around you. For example – constantly biting your nails, staying up all night, wasting time or spending a bit too much time on social media etc. Once you recognise these bad habits replace them with some healthier ones and make this change a steady one. And in case you are unable to think/ponder about your bad habits, please go and talk to your mom/ family and she will tell-it-all effortlessly! Numerous participants in my ‘Change Your Life’ Workshop breakthrough their years of bad habits in an instant and never returns there.

5. Reckon the distractions –

What are some of the things that distract you from your goals? The past becomes such a beautiful place if you can use it productively. Reckon those distractions by analyzing the amount of time that you have been wasting on it. After recognizing the same think about ways that you can control being distracted from them. What are some of the self-control methods that you need to incorporate? Are you able to say NO often? Why not? Do some soul-searching if you want a better future.

Why don’t you have a look at one of my books ‘All is well’ that has helped hundreds of people who have been living in the past? Learning from the past becomes an easy task as soon as you let it go and understand that it is not about just understanding problems, it is about investing time in mitigating the same! So accept your past instead of holding onto it and let it go by acknowledging the problems and being grateful for the good times!